Thoughts on Turning 30

I turned 30 this week. Gasp! I know.

In the days leading up to my birthday, my Mom asked if I was doing alright with the inevitable. I reassured her that I was completely ok with it all. After all, how would going to bed 29 and waking up 30 feel any differently?

The truth is: it did. 30 felt completely different.

I suppose I can compare it to my 12 year old self on the eve of my 13th birthday. It was time for bed, but I didn’t dare turn off the bedside lamp; because if I did, I’d fall asleep and wake up a teenager! Just the thought gave me butterflies. Anxious, reluctant butterflies, that I wished would fly away and never return. My mom came to say good-night; but to my surprise, climbed right into bed with me! Instinctively, she just knew. She knew I was struggling to transition from childhood into young womanhood. Wrapping her arms around me, she held me tight — just she and I on my little twin bed. I looked at her and began to cry, “But Mom, I don’t want to be 13! I want to stay a little girl, forever.” She smiled and said, “But don’t you see? You’ll always be my little girl. Even when you’re my age, you’ll still be my little girl.”

Fast forward to the next decade: my 20s. For the most part my 20s can be summed up as a decade of love and learning experiences: college graduate, turned new wife, living in a far away state, teaching my first class of 22 first graders.

Then what seemed like overnight, time chose to pick up the pace.

We bought our first home, traveled to new places, got an adorable dog, started a blog, and worked through our fair share of unexpected hardships. These past 10 years have had some indescribable ups and some unfortunate downs. But through it all I’ve fallen in love, on three different occassions, with three different boys. And for that I can say, I’m incredibly blessed.

Which brings me to today: my 30-and-4-days-old self. I do feel different. I am different; but in the very best way. All of the years past, have made me into the person I am now. And I like who she’s becoming, for the most part. Yet, somehow I still feel like I’m 13 going on 30, fluttering butterflies included. But I’m choosing to embrace this new chapter of life with my dancing shoes on, having an open heart, dressed with an optimistic outlook, and ready to push myself to new heights — to learn new things, to do more good, and gracefully endure the bumps that will surely come. For if there’s one thing that time has taught me, it’s that life continues to get better with time.

20 Responses to Thoughts on Turning 30

  • lauren says:

    My bday is march 5th and I turned 32. Turning 30 for me was hard too, I realized I was growing up and I wasn’t 18 anymore ha! The past two years have flown and I guess that is the scary fast time goes how short life really is. Makes me live everyday with intention and live a life that please the Lord. Blessings to you Missy, may this year be a wonderful year filled with joy and happiness and new adventures for you and your family!! Turning 30 isnt so bad, and you dont look a day over 25!! ;)

  • angie says:

    these next 10 years will look good on you! can’t wait to see what they bring you. possibly another baby? new travels? it’s so fun to see how you live life! happy belated birthday, missy!

  • TC says:

    Happy Birthday, Missy! The thirties are awesome! I found myself more confident, self-assured and just generally excited about life. I hope the same will be true for you. :)

  • Gaby says:

    OMG Missy I’m also turning 30 in about two weeks… Happily married and all, no kids. We’re “reproductively challenged” as most would say. I’ve following you and your beautiful family for some time now. I just love the idea of a happy family. I think you’re such a good role model. I like to think of me as a successful young woman, you know career first. But now, all I can about is babies. Suddenly I’m starting to feel the pressure and I just don’t know how to react to that, I’d love to get pregnant, but I don’t know what else to do. I am HAPPY for you and from the bottom of my heart I wish you a Happy Birthday. Greetings from Queretaro, Mexico.

  • Kelsey says:

    Happy (late) Birthday!!! And what a great way to look at things, so many accomplishments and learning experiences. And such a beautiful family to love!

  • Dyana says:

    I’m turning 39 tomorrow (8th). I thought turning 30 would be scary but it just gets better! Enjoy it; embrace it. I’m now user to 40 and I hope it’s even better!

  • Melissa says:

    Thank you so much for this post! I am turning 31 next month. I teased about the whole 30 thing last year, but it didn’t bother me. Now, turning 31, I am feeling those butterflies as if truely realizing that my 20′s are gone. As you said, it is the next chapter and I am sure God has amazing things planned!

    Side note- my son turns 4 and my daughter 1 all within the same week next month as well. Keep your fingers crossed I make it through. It will be emotional!! :)

  • Megan says:

    I just turned 30 in January and I felt very similar about it! My 20s were good, and definitely better than my teens. Of course there’s been ups and downs, but God has really blessed me. So here’s to an even better decade, full of spiritual growth, maturity, wisdom and grace for all of us! And hopefully a family for me. :)

  • Happy Birthday! I was the opposite I could not wait to be 21 years old from the time I was 12 but nowadays I cringe as each year passes, its crazy how quickly time flies as we get older but the amount of things we accomplish in our adult years makes life beautiful! Lots of love Courtney Bentley

  • Jenedy says:

    I’ve thought about this too as I approach 30 this August, and as I anticipate the birth of our fourth child. It’s weird because I still feel like a teenager in so many ways, but then I look at reality which tells me, “Honey, you’re soon to be the mother to four! You’re an adult!” But like you I’m just enjoying each day, and hoping playing with my little ones everyday will keep me young. ;) Happy Birthday beautiful friend!

  • Noelle says:

    I couldn’t have said that better myself! I turn 30 in April and I can’t believe so much time has passed. It feels like I am still young and hip, (ha!) but the wrinkles on my face don’t make me look it! But, being young at heart and loving every new day is what really matters!

  • April says:

    I loved this entry! I am approaching 33 next month and I have really enjoyed the 30′s so far. It really does make you slow down and appreciate life and health. It is a much more grounded time than the 20′s. :)
    I just have to tell you that I browse a lot of blogs that I find through pinterest or recipe searches but yours is one of 2 that I ever read on a regular basis. I also have 2 little boys and I am impressed with the way you capture your lives. It’s beautiful.
    ~April (from Maine)

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